The 50 phobias of August Gray (18+)

This short CSSA is written for  FEAR the FEAR Writing Challenge. I’m using the title ‘The 50 shades of Grey’ (note: I haven’t seen the movie and never read the book) and different kinds of fears.
Also I have used the word ‘Modesty’ for #coolprompts
For Ragtag Prompt – the word ‘Trace’
For Fandango’s One Word Prompt – ‘Curtail’


Mr August Gray aka SpillOutMyGuts – famous paparazzi
Ms RidingYourFace – new secretary
Mr ViolentVibration – co-worker and photographer
Mrs CuttingOffTheOxygen – the mom of paparazzi

Scene 1.

So many factors can curtail a career. Ms RidingYourFace knew that very well. But her brain injury and international ambitions pushed her towards a new roads – to become a full-time secretary for the most famous paparazzi in the world, Mr August Gray (known also as Mr SpillOutMyGuts). 

Ms RidingYourFace learned her skills by studying the pictures out of the old gossip magazines. She was ready.

The office.  

Mr Gray (looking at the table full of photos): …mmm, strip away the metaphors, dear. That’s what I’m telling! Add the photo of her butt and the one at the party, where she looks completely wasted.
Mr ViolentVibration: Will do. But it was taken 15 years ago, August.
Mr Gray: Order is order. My mom always says that, and moms are always right. (after the pause) If you want I can call her for the double check.
Mr ViolentVibration: (scared) No. Let’s do as you said.
Mr Gray: C’mon, I’m just kidding, haha. Let’s go to the bathroom – for the inspiration (he winked). You know well I have this freaky autophobia, can’t be alone there. (on the way to the toilet) Don’t forget to grab the bottle of wine and glasses!

Scene 2. 

The Office. Near the elevator.

Mr Gray: Emily? What’s up?
Ms RidingYourFace: No. My name is Jane.
Mr Gray: Hello Jane! Nice to see you. So fresh and smokin’ hot.
Mr ViolentVibration: She is our new employee. The first day at work.
Ms RidingYourFace: I’d like to say how much I appreciate this opportunity, Mr Gray 

The word made Mr Gray jump …and then – fall

Mr ViolentVibration: (screaming in schock and anger) Call the ambulance! And his mom! 

Meanwhile, Mr Gray aka SpillOutMyGuts have tried to fix the better position for his right hand, while crawling on the floor of the office. He had atelophobia – fear of imperfection.

Scene 3.


Mr ViolentVibration: I have no time for your bullshit. You almost killed him. I gave you the list with all 50 phobias yesterday. 
Ms RidingYourFace: I couldn’t believe my eyes when I read it. How is it even possible? He is a paparazzi after all!!
Mr ViolentVibration: Last warning ⚠️  (he pulled out a large, wooden-hard, on the way to become antique ‘Toy’ straight from his jeans).
Ms RidingYourFace: This looks a little bit smaller than on the picture you sent me yesterday.
Mr ViolentVibration: It wasn’t mine. The Boss sent it.
Ms RidingYourFace: THE Boss? Mr Graa..August? I thought he has – ithyphallophobia– the fear of seeing, thinking or having an erect penis.
Mr ViolentVibration: Yes, he does, but he said your butt needed to be trained so you could use it properly…on the battle-field. So – we took the picture.
Ms RidingYourFace: (checking the list of 50 phobias) What about hedonophobia or fear of feeling pleasure?
Mr ViolentVibration: (angry) He wasn’t pleased enough to feel the fear. No more questions!

Her eyes lit up and she positively beamed: ‘What’s next?’ Mr ViolentVibration extended his tongue and almost immediately, muffled groans began to emanate from between slim, tanned thighs of Ms RidingYourFace.
Mr ViolentVibration
had placed the bulb of his powerful Toy at the base of her end…and they both giggled. 

Mr August Gray (while watching the action on the laptop-screen): Keep giggle, guys, keep giggle. 

Scene 4.

The Office. Cafeteria.

Mrs CuttingOffTheOxygen: Well, dear, I think we are drifting off the subject.
Mr ViolentVibration: (looking at her grey shoes) My limit is only 6 hours, you know that.
Mrs CuttingOffTheOxygen: The trick is in placing your ViolentHitachi right at the bottom. We need the bottom-pictures. We are suffering from lack of it! We are loosing our money! Your money!
Mr ViolentVibration: (almost crying) I kept My Power directly on her ‘sweet spot’ and then began to roll it in a circular motions.
Mrs CuttingOffTheOxygen: It was intensely erotic to watch you suffering like that, my dear. But you are the employee. You have to do as you told, otherwise (she slapped his jeans for several long seconds, until poor Mr ViolentVibration collapsed by her side)…

‘Next time concentrate on the mission!’ – were her last words. 

Scene 5.

Big Screen. All the employees of the office watching the amazing shots of the famous actor Mr DreamBig banging even more famous actress Mrs BigBingo.

Mr ViolentVibration: God, that was the most HAWT thing that I’ve ever witnessed. It reminds me that modesty is all gone. Poor fashion-world! This is definitely going to be something that they will do a lot more often, in the future (he winked to Ms RidingYourFace).
Ms RidingYourFace: (with the smile) Ahhh, boys. Always wrong. Look at his hollow, 0,01-inch GRAY silicone-made, caged Toy…
Mr ViolentVibration: (running his fingers along his violet jeans, in despair…) Or maybe he just kill her next time. 

Mr August jumps and then – falls. On the floor. 

Mr ViolentVibration: (screaming) Call the ambulance! And his mom!

The End

Next post/next week – ‘According to Luke Copyright’

Wisdom from Luke #12

#1 Understand, that all women love ‘simple things’. Be a man, unzip and show it!


#2 Bring the book on the first date…to open her legs with it.


#3 Promise me, you’ll always remember, that women doesn’t have ‘young souls’. They were born as 300 years old! Don’t get scared! 


#4 The women are like shadows. If you will follow them – they’ll try to escape. If you’ll try to escape – they’ll follow. 


#5 Nothing inspires more courage in a woman than the size of the man she loves…


Next post – CSSA ‘The 50 shades of August Grey’ for FEAR the FEAR Writing Challenge

Wisdom from Luke #11

Remember my previous post How to overcome sadness?

There’s a better way – find a therapist! But only a sexy one!
Sexy is from the word ‘sex’, not from the word ‘hot, pretty, beauty’.

The real hotness never takes the day OFF!

You can always shut your eyes and pretend that you are blindfolded. At least in the beginning…Yes, it can be painful. And it will be expensive. Very expensive. But if you are seeking for ‘Melinda of your Dreams’ – that’s the right place to start. Practice is the KEY!


Do NOT sex your sexy therapist TOO often and TOO much. Otherwise she’ll get used to it and it’s going to be more difficult to wave the ‘good-byes’ when the time will come – to move on – to use your perfect TOOL on the more elastic-stretchy-spring-alike-burning-hot-chick-en.


TOO healthy to ask for therapist? Desire can be a very powerful motivating tool, my dear friend…


Cheers! Luke Copyright/


Next post – CSSA play 

It was my last hour, in my own bed…or How To Overcome Sadness?

I just love this title. You?
It sounds really sad, don’t you think?

I decided to introduce you to SAD Luke Copyright today:


Where’s my bed??

Here’s the Lesson about Sadness:

Sadness is one of the “6 basic emotions” described by Paul Ekman, along with happiness, anger, surprise, fear and disgust. Luke agrees. But he would like to add: 

‘Sadness’ is also a moment when you are loosing connection with ‘whatever you’ve got in your pants’.

Take Away: No connection with your ‘doodle’ = No sex = No happy you

There are only 3 reasons for sadness

No matter how happy we are in our day to day lives, we’ll still have those days when we feel sad. If you are very happy today, go check ‘over-joyful’ post from Becky and buy her some coffee – Timeless Wisdom – #happiness

Reason #1 – Psychological

Example: you woke up and can’t find Melinda (or was it Linda?) in your bedroom. It’s just fkn empty! You are starting to feel sad, because you are usually getting a perfect wood-stand in the mornings. Of course, your sad reflection in the mirror, while you are jerkin’ off in the shower, is the reaction to emotional, intellectual, social and spiritual LOSS!


Reason #2 – External

Example: You are rushing home, to those awesome soft boobs of Melinda, but instead you are bumping into the bones of very sad Mrs TooDryToEnter. When you meet a person who is already sad, you probably respond with a sad facial expression and your dream or desire to jump on Melinda’s boobs is slowly vanishing…


Reason #3 – Personal 

Some people are more susceptible to sadness than others are. And you are THAT ONE!
I don’t know, buddy… maybe an extra bj will help?
In any case you can order Luke’s personal help, but remember: you should be a female and not older than 25 (preferebly blonde and Victoria Secret’s Model, or at least trying to get THERE).


Next and the most important -> How to overcome sadness?

‘Spicy up your nights’

There’s a reason so many people enjoy ‘spicy’: food, parties, girls, bodies… Spicy up until it BURNS! That will send a very strong push-signal to your brain and your d@@k will release some happy endorphins. Who knows, maybe straight on the mouth of the pretty chick… but you can choose any place you like.


‘Music – Laugh – Exercise’

All three together and on the bed only!
In the company of the hot blonde beauties (preferably!)

One of the best ways to boost your mood from sad to happy in just a few minutes is – naked, laughing/or dancing Melinda (preferably on the HARDest part of your body).


There’s nothing better than that!

What? You are sad, because you doesn’t have any Melinda yet?
Dude, for the personal ‘coaching’ in this area – follow Luke and study all his posts with a pen in your hands…thats the only way!

Ha – ha!

Next post – Wisdom From Luke

What NOT to do when you have a Big Ego? #maleversion

  • Do Not Panic! You can control your BIG Ego (especially in the bed with a hot model) with the careful inspection and by using a proper push-in-pull-out methods.
  • Try NOT to kill your BIG Ego by inspecting female ‘pesticides’. Using unknown ‘pesticides’ to satisfy the Ego can make you very sick.


  • Do not use the girls that appear to be “I am home-made” or “I am custom orientated”! Home-made girls could be dangerous for your BIG Ego = they might make the size of the Ego look less as it is.


  • Do not apply too many hot chicks directly to your BIG Ego. This could make you too busy and exhausted.


  • Do not store the cameras above the bed. Storing stuff right above the bed gives the girl too many reasons to hide or to perform poorly…Also this makes more difficult to change the old chick to a new one, when your BIG Ego is done with her.


  • Do not move your BIG Ego from one girl to another TOO often. Moving your Ego may spread the bed bugs. Or something worse…


  • Do not wrap the body of the girl you have used to satisfy your Ego in the black plastic bag and never ever place them on the sun.

What to do when you have a Big Ego?

  • Make sure your Ego is BIG enough… 


Next post – Wisdom From Luke
Gif’s and images – 

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